I am back.

I am sharing my life after a long break because it will help me heal. I have always blogged funny stories and tried to be fun and make my followers smile with my stories.

I will try to share with ya'll the worst year of my life. I still can't believe my husband of 25 years died of cancer 12 days after he was diagnosed. The veterans medical office in Charlotte and the specialists in Salisbury an hour away watched my husband get sicker and sicker and let him suffer more than anyone could imagine. I wrote letters to the specialists the night before his appointments begging the doctors to help my husband-I also told them in person: "look at my husband! Can't you see he is dying!!!" How can 4 specialists ignore Dens symptons and say, hes OK. 4 specilists doctors cant all be ignorant. On December 7th I drove Den to Salisbury VA for an appointment with the liver doctor. Den could not get out of his wheelchair because he was in so much pain and wasnt able to eat for many days. Dens stomach looked like he was 9 months pregnant. The doctor said hes in good shape. I wheeled him down the hall to the VA emergency room. Den cried - we waited 6 hours to see the doctor. He said: all of Dens doctors are happy with his progress. Two days later Den had another doctor appointment. He lived on our first floor in a recliner. He couldn't even get up to go to the bathroom. I helped him... You know. TMI
2 days after his doctor appointment and the VA emergency room at the VA he had another doctor appointment. I tried to dress him but he couldnt stand up when I tried to put his pants on. I looked at my husband face to face and said: You know it's time. You know what I have to do. He shook his head, yes.

I called 911 and when he was in the emergency room the doctor took one look at Den and said: Mr Davis, you are knocking on deaths door and I think you have cancer, everywhere, your stomach is so huge, I believe that its tumors.
Den wanted to go to the VA even though we had health insurance. He believed the VA would take care of him better than any other doctors because he served our country.
12 days after Den was admitted in the hospital he died. Non-hodgkins lymphoma. The most rapidly growing cancer but the most treatable cancer. He went the the doctor initally because he had a groth on his neck. He was told: it's a sebaceous cyst. The day after he died he was scheduled for a biopsy.
Den was let go from his job after he missed work for a month and we lost all of his benefits and life insurance. He paid on a life insurance policy for over twenty years that negligent 2 months before he got sick and used the equity to help pay our bills.

Bottom line: my parents said they will pay my house payments for 1 year. I work 2 jobs and can pay our other bills but sometimes I can't afford extras like food.
We will be homeless in December and will have to move 500 miles away and live in my parents basement. My children will be destroyed. I havent told them yet. God help me